Who Says Words with My Mouth?

Who Says Words With My Mouth?
All day I think about it, then at night I say it.
Where did I come from, and what am I supposed to be doing?
I have no idea.
My soul is from elsewhere, I’m sure of that,
and I intend to end up there.
This drunkenness began in some other tavern.
When I get back around to that place,
I’ll be completely sober.  Meanwhile,
I’m like a bird from another continent, sitting in this aviary.
The day is coming when I fly off,
but who is it now in my ear who hears my voice?
Who says words with my mouth?
Who looks out with my eyes? What is the soul?
I cannot stop asking.
If I could taste one sip of an answer,
I could break out of this prison for drunks.
I didn’t come here of my own accord, and I can’t leave that way.
Whoever brought me here will have to take me home.
This poetry, I never know what I’m going to say.
I don’t plan it.
When I’m outside the saying of it,  I get very quiet and rarely speak at all.
I wish I could speak my language–that thing for which there are no words–so you might understand.  Maybe one day I’ll be a poet or composer or painter but until then, Rumi will continue speak me.
I try to distill my experience of the world in a way that others might understand, engage with and, perhaps choose to share with me at some point.  Lately, though, I’ve been struggling with words and find it impossible to express the wordless knowing of creation that just is and how I dance with it–daily, intimately.
I find myself unable to distill my experience of the world in a way that is engaging and accessible to those I want to reach, need to connect to.  How can I do the same while not losing the dynamism and the extraordinary nature of my encounters as I walk the world?
How do I share the beauty of that for which there are no words when words–lots of them–are what people seem to want?  Words that are familiar, that are comforting, that maintain status quo, that merely imply change, hint at truths, lots of words that don’t say much.
I just don’t know.
Until then, more Rumi will have to do:

I serve that orb in heaven,
Say no word but Orb!
Speak to me of nothing
But sweetness and light
Not of bother, but of treasure
And if you cannot find the words
Don’t bother.

Yesterday a craze came over me
Love saw, came up to me:
Here I am,
Don’t shout,
Don’t rip your shirt,
Hush, shh!

I spoke:
Love, I’m scared of that other thing
There is no other thing, say nothing!
I will whisper secrets in your ear
You just nod in asseveration
Speak in semaphore

A nova, a celestial love
Burst bright above the heartpath
So exquisite the quest of heart,
It cannot be expressed
I asked:
Heart, what orb is this?
Heart intimated:
Beyond fathom
Be quiet, forget!
Is this the face of man or angel?
Beyond men and angels

What is it? Tell me, I’m in a whirl
Whirl on, keep quiet!
You sit within this room
Whose walls reflect
Mere forms and suppositions
Get up, go out, move on,
Keep quiet!


6 thoughts on “Who Says Words with My Mouth?

  1. I feel you may have an impossible task, Ingrid. ‘Taste and see’ is maybe the only appropriate invitation here. Rumi himself said something to the effect that, ‘a great silence came upon me, and I wondered why I ever tried to use words’. Love knows words are weak things, but, ‘bright is the ring of words, when the right man rings them’. Yours ring so true.

    1. Maybe there’s nothing here that needs to be understood, worked out or whatever. You simply are this energy, love etc which is the Essence. The only problem is your mind wanting to figure it out… and that mind is itself that Essence, of course. Dog chasing tail. Those who’ve been touched don’t need to understand either – they just know.

      All this talk doesn’t pay the bills of course, but I feel it comes close to what’s really going on. Maybe you know this yourself anyway 🙂

  2. Yep, I’m the embodiment of all that. Am all that. I know that. I don’t know, though, how to pay the bills. Therein lies the rub. In the same manner I’ve given myself a year to be homeless, I’ve given myself time to figure out how to make this work so I can touch those for whom I’m here and actually not be homeless permanently. The time will be up shortly.

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